You’d probably never guess the what these young, beautiful women have in common. Each of their stories is unique, and the bonds they share are strong. Many of their friendships will last a lifetime.
They are US Military widows, and part of the American Widow Project. Hearing about their heroes has given me a whole new level of appreciation for the sacrifices military families make every day.
For the past few years, it’s been an incredible honor to spend some time with some of them at AWP getaway weekends-Folly Beach, South Carolina, Phoenix, Arizona and in the Great Smoky Mountains of Tennessee.
What’s funny is how I always show up with pages of notes, thinking I might somehow offer them encouragement. The reality is quite the opposite, as their stories always teach me volumes about love, survival and embracing life again after unthinkable loss.
I wanted to share a few things the “widow sisters” have taught me.
1) Just because I’m smiling doesn’t mean I’m not grieving. I have to keep going even when life feels like, “swimming in peanut butter.”
2) If you have a funny story or a photo of my man, please send it to me. Saying his name reminds me of the difference he made in your life, and that you miss him, too.
3) F-i-n-e is a four letter word. If I say it, and you don’t think I mean it, you probably need to ask a few more questions.
4) I might need to drop off the social media grid for a while; but please keep calling and texting me. I cherish your friendship.
5) Over time I may decide to go back to school, learn to play guitar or even move cross country. Starting new things is a good way to keep moving forward.
6) When someone says, “call if you need anything,” I probably won’t. A better idea might be to suggest, “I’d love to bring your dinner tonight or tomorrow night- OK?” Also, gift cards for a movie, restaurant, groceries are also greatly appreciated.
7) Anniversaries, birthdays and patriotic holidays can be particularly tough days… the perfect time to let me know you’re thinking about me and my man.
8) Even though I will forever love and miss my hero, I’m tougher than I ever thought I was. I will survive this.
Thank you, ladies for showing me what true grit looks like.
The American Widow Project believes no military widow should feel alone in her grief. To find out how you can get involved, please visit their inspiring website here.