You’d probably never guess the what these phenomenal beautiful women have in common. Each of their stories is unique, and the bond they share is strong- many will last a lifetime.
They are US Military widows, and part of the American Widow Project. Hearing about their heroes has given me a whole new level of appreciation for the sacrifices military families make every day.
For the past couple years, it’s been an incredible honor to spend some time with them at three AWP getaway weekends-Folly Beach, South Carolina, Phoenix, Arizona and in the Great Smoky Mountains of Tennessee.
What’s funny is how I always show up with pages of notes, thinking I could somehow offer them encouragement. What actually happens is quite the opposite, as their stories continue to teach me volumes about love and embracing life again after unthinkable loss.
This Memorial Day weekend I wanted to share a few things the “widow sisters” have taught me.
1) just because I’m smiling doesn’t mean I’m not grieving. I have to keep going even when it feels like I’m, “swimming in peanut butter.”
2) if you have a funny story or a photo of my man, please send it to me. Saying his name reminds me of the difference he made in your life, and that you miss him, too.
3) f-i-n-e is a four letter word. If I say it, and you don’t think I mean it, you probably need to ask a few more questions.
4) I might need to drop off the social media grid for a while; but please keep calling and texting me. I cherish your friendship.
5) over time I may decide to go back to school, learn to play guitar or even move cross country. Starting new things is a good way to keep moving forward.
6) when someone says, “call if you need anything,” I probably won’t. A better idea might be to suggest, “I’d love to bring your dinner tonight or tomorrow night- OK?” Also, gift cards for a movie, restaurant, groceries are also greatly appreciated.
7) if an anniversary, birthday or patriotic holiday is coming up, please let me know you’re thinking about me and my hero. Those can be particularly difficult days.
8) Even though I will forever love and miss my hero, I’m tougher than I ever thought I was. I will survive this.
Thank you, ladies for showing me what true grit looks like.
The American Widow Project believes no military widow should feel alone in her grief. To find out how you can get involved, please visit their inspiring website here http://americanwidowproject.org/