Have you ever gotten so caught up in grief, you weren’t sure you’d ever find your way out? I sure have.
It was four months after my mom’s hit-me-like-a speeding-train sudden death. Even though I was pretending I had this grief thing under control, in reality I was stuck, and had no idea how to dig myself out of the deep sorrow. A typical day would be spent at home, safe from awkward questions and embarrassing public tears. Anybody else been there?
One morning after the kids had left for school, I settled into my cozy chair and started to think about my mom.
What if I forget about her? What if my memory fades and I don’t remember the time she invited the entire Emory University Dental Fraternity to our house for Thanksgiving Dinner? I have no idea what the turkey tasted like that year… but do remember the holiday being most delicious!
What if I forget about the day she followed a speeding ambulance through traffic in Atlanta, to beat the crowd to Hobby Lobby? You seriously can’t make this stuff up.
I start to write every sweet, embarrassing and hilarious story I could possibly recall. About two hours later I realized I hadn’t moved a muscle- except to write.
The coolest thing happened that morning. As decades of memories poured out on the spiral notebook pages~ I started to smile, and even laugh again through the tears. Tears of thankfulness for this rare and extraordinary woman I called Mom.
How about you?
I don’t know your story, but I do know that remembering the people we love is one of the most beautiful ways not only to honor them… but also to begin to heal.
Do you have a place you can go to write their story?
My prayer is that as you recall and write your good, bad and crazy ambulance-chasing Hobby Lobby stories, that you’ll begin to see sweet glimmers of healing.
God’s peace, my friends.
Please visit the Grief Survivor FaceBook page to share your story. Do you love a great podcast? Here’s a sweet dad tribute from Happy Healthy Caregiver founder, Elizabeth Miller.